What *NOT* to say to a Wheely!

Fancy a race ?  Sure ! Let me just park my wheelchair up and do a warm up and i'll sprint your ass off !!! Seriously why do you think it's funny to offer to race me because i'm in a chair ?! Firstly I would win ..... no really I would ! Secondly you'd end up with very sore feet ... not from running so fast in order to beat me but because in order to beat you I would have to run your feet over ( and possibly the rest of you depending what sort of mood i'm in ;) ) so that I can leave you squirming on the floor like a squashed slug ( nice visual huh ? ) My chair is a wheelchair not a rocket ( unfortunately ) So foul play WOULD be required AND used !! So ..... meet you at the starting line ? 😋

You are so lucky being able to sit down I have to walk everywhere ! So I was using a big supermarket a few months ago and as myself and my husband got to the checkout I remembered something we had forgotten ( as we always seem to do lol ) so I went back and grabbed it , as I got back to the checkout I returned to the checkout woman telling myself and my husband how awful she has it having to walk everywhere with backache and how I don't know how lucky I am being able to sit down all day .... Yes REALLY!!! Funnily enough "lucky" isn't something I often feel when associating it with using a wheelchair ! Lucky is what I feel when I win a big mac on mcdonalds monopoly !!! Or when I wake up and my adoring husband brings me breakfast in bed ( pahaha who am I kidding ! ) Lucky is something that checkout lady should have felt for not ending up being underneath my wheels 😉 So i'm sorry your legs ache a little from doing what they are supposed to do ..... but i...

Have you got a licence for that thing ?! Have you got a licence for your legs ?! or your feet ?! or both ?! Didn't think so ... would it be stupid to ask that ? .......... So of course the answer would be NO! I don't ..... because it isn't a car ...it's a wheelchair ... *rolls eyes* Although I DID have to pass a test ..... no really I did !! Before I was "allowed" to use a powerchair I was taken into a car park and asked to read the registration plate of a car parked 20 metres away .... I know this because he embarrassingly walked that distance pushing one of those metre wheels you used to LOVE using at school.....the ONLY maths lesson that was made enjoyable for most of us !! .. Then I had to negotiate around a series of cones set up to make me fail...... but I DID IT ! Ha ! In your face miserable suited man ! Then he put some chairs in my way ..... I ACED it ! he was clearly either gutted or impressed .... or maybe he just had wind I really ...

Woahhhhhh Slow Down Speedy !!!! Ok so imagine you just bought a new pair of shoes and are walking down the street in them, people see you and theatrically divebomb out of your path as if some crazy ass sniper just lined a lazer dot up on their forehead ..... and then when you think the level of stupid has risen to it's max ..... out come the words .....                 "Woahh SLOW DOWN SPEEDY !!!! " Slow down ??? Slow down ??? I'm in a wheelchair and depending on which I am using that day (Manual or power ) The maximum speed I have the option of travelling at is approximately equal to the speed your husband gets out of the door when you tell him it's time to go clothes shopping ..... ( For those that don't have a husband .... that is really REALLY slowly !!! ) Well that is what happens daily to wheelies ..... our wheels are our feet , our legs, well most of our body most of the time ! The only time I am likely to slow down is if their feet ...

What Not To Say To A Wheely!                                                                  I'm possibly one of the most politically incorrect people you will meet..... If you are easily offended .... or just offended.... Goodbye ! ;) I don't thi nk before I speak quite often but you will always know where you are with me I call a spade a spade but have zero patience when people say stupid things.... and since being in a wheelchair I appear to have become a magnet for stupid !!!  This blog is here because I wanted to share that stupid . I am not selfish and there is plenty to go around ! Enjoy and welcome to the world of whee ls !